Trip to surmise

Hold my hand and close your eyes
Let me take you through some colourful darkness ~
On a trip to surmise.
See it, feel it ~ and conclude;
before It's winter
And before
The rain of my eye dries...

Through the shadows of the lane
Where lovers meet and part
Smell if you can ~
The unfulfilled longing,
Floating on a lake of desire
Writhing with ecstasy and pain

See far away the desert dunes merging
In the skies of the morrow...
And watch their regret rising
When the drops of tempting water
Quench their thirst
But washes away the learning...

Look now the moon waxes and wanes...
A forgotten song
Flows in the thick air,
And the pretty butterfly
Clings ~
.
.
To the colours of her chains…

"Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now?"

Met an old friend after 5 years. We were working in the same organization 5 years back, were very good friends, so used to discuss our professional aspects with each other as well. I remember once we were discussing about appearing for some job interviews for changing the existing job. As we were preparing for the interviews, we started discussing about the questions that the interviewer might ask, so that we could be prepared for the same. One question that we were anticipating was ~ "Where do you see yourself after 5 years ?" It seems, this a favourite question with the interviewers! We both had cooked up some answer to this question, which the interviewer would like to hear, and consider us fit to be for the position in question.

Well, we both did leave the company we were working for at that time in 2004. We walked our own ways, and now when we met after 5 years, we were talking about what twists and turns life had taken in all these years.

He had moved on to work for a pharma company in Hyderabad in quality assurance department, stuck there for 5 years, in the duration did his masters in business administration (sponsored by his company), and started working in Project management department ~ a field completely different to what he was working in earlier, and recently he joined another pharma company, back in Ahmedabad, working as a project manager.

I don’t think in his answer to the question "Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now ?" any of this was featured. He had never thought of doing master in business administration or changing his work profile, or for that matter staying in hyderabad for 5 years and then coming back to ahmedabad again!

I for my part, on leaving the company where I was working 5 years back, took a long break from work for personal reasons, worked in a completely different field ~ assisting in direction for documentary film and anchoring for stage shows, went to mumbai to work for a company of my own field (pharma) for two years and then as fate would have it joined back in the same company in ahmedabad where I was working 5 years back. Working in this company for almost 3 years now.

In my answer of "Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now ?" also, none of this was expected ! Not in my wildest dreams had I imagined that I would be working into the fields that I did. Nor had I imagined that I would come back to work in this same organization that I had left 5 years back.

While talking about all this, we could feel how our lives were led by something much more powerful than us, something that has planned the course and milestones for this journey called life.

In the light of this whole thing the above question and whatever answer we think to it seems quite superficial. Probably a question like this might be helping the interviewers to get a peek into the candidate's psyche or guage his/her's ambitions in life. Who knows, they might also be more or less succeeding at. But I feel that while such questions may have some meaning in the corporate world, they seem meaningless looking at the bigger picture of life.

~Cooking and music ~

A saucepan.
Few drops of olive oil...
~Some fire~
…..Notes of music rise in the background…..
Slowly reaching you and engulfing you like a fragrance…
You dance in it a little and then,
Come back to heat of the fire ~ softly tickling the olive oil...

"....Silver coins that jingle-jangle,
Dancing shoes that dance in time
All the secret of her dark eyes,
They did sing a gypsy rhyme…"

Don williams singing in his velvety voice ~ softly tickling the soul...

In goes some pieces of celery, onion & garlic…
Shwish…………….sings the saucepan too.

Some stirring ~ to a golden brown colour,
Some colouring ~ with the freshly made tomato sauce

Next song begins ~

"Come away with me in the night

Come away with me

And I will write you a song..."

Some more stirring..
Some sprinkling..
Parsely and a few more Italian herbs…
~Gains of white salt ~
Blending into the redness...

In goes the boiled penne into the inviting blend..

"...Come away with me

and we'll kiss

On a mountaintop..

Come away with me

And I'll, never stop loving youuu..."

...…more aroma rising
Filling up the senses,
~Promising delight and fulfillment ~

Eventually ~Pasta looks cooked~
Just the right blend~
Of taste and aroma,
Of seen and unseen,
Of hunger and food,
Of vision and form,
Of wishing and creating
Of wanting and receiving
Of colour and music
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Of body and soul…………

"I'm going back someday
Come what may, to Blue Bayou
Where the folks are fine
And the workd is mine, on Blue Bayou
Where those fishing boats,
With their sails aboat
If I could only see ~
A familiar sunrise through sleepy eyes,
How happy I'd be..."



The music continues……

You can't upset me...

“I’m not upset…you don’t have the power to upset me...you don’t matter that much…” Kate Winslet says in the movie “The Reader” to Ralph Fiennes.

Those who don’t matter to us can’t upset us…I agree with this. Why should I be affected by someone’s behavior towards me whom I don’t consider important enough..? Why should I let even small seeds of negativity germ inside me by the words or actions of those who don’t count..? But on saturday at work someone not at all significant in my life did something and I got upset...! I guess the person didn’t matter, but by what he did, my self respect (maybe ego..) got hurt... and I reacted accordingly…didn’t show my hurt in an outrageous way, but walked out of the scene. Wouldn’t have left, had this thought of him hurting my ‘I’ had not come into my min...

now feeling somewhat bad about my own reaction...

Reflecting on the whole thing on how differently I should have reacted I feel that I should have stayed positive, I should not have let my equilibrium be disturbed any bit at all…I should have thought that let him think and behave in anyway he wishes ~that is the choice that he is making...I should not have let my false ‘I’ come in the picture…and should have chosen to stay in my undisturbed positive frame of mind…

The road is long ~ full of pebbles of different shape, and turn...
The journey’s just begun, Miles and miles ahead to learn...

One lesson learnt...hope to remember it...