Staring into time...

Thats my grandfather. He's 86 and still going reasonably strong ~ In the spirit that is. Though he's not strong enough physically to walk much, every evening he sits in the parking of our apartments and keeps gazing at the street ~ at people coming, going, children playing, shouting, laughing. Every day when I return from work he's sitting there. When people moving around him dont even have a moment to stop and look at him gazing into the spaces of life, wonder what goes in his mind ~ Does he think of his childhood ? His youth ? The good and and bad experiences of life ? His realized and unrealized dreams ? The calculations of gain and loss of life...?

As I take a moment to stop and be in this moment with him, without him being aware of it, a thought suddenly comes to my mind ~ What would I be doing when I will be so old ? Would I be happy with the way I have lived? Would I have any regrets? Sitting like this then, would I be at peace with myself ? And then the decision comes ~ I will live my life in a way that at a time when all I will be able to do is gaze into space and time, and do calculations of my gain and loss ~ I would be able to say ~ Who cares about the gains and losses ! I have lived this life as it should have been lived ~ fully, truly and soulfully and that is all that matters... the silence inside me would not matter then, because I would have heard and played the music of LIFE...