Nothing is lost...

Was'nt this the same time some year in the past when all I was longing for, was the basic things in life which I had always taken for granted and were no longer with me then ? ~ mom's voice waking me up in the morning while I drag the bedsheet above my head to sleep a little more, my dad's warmth making this world a better place to live in, my sister faking anger at my teasing her, my close friends with whom I had shared my best and the worst moments...

I had left behind everything I had and everyone I knew, to the winds of destiny ~ which had taken me to a place from where I could neither see nor touch the place which defined the beat of my life, the people who defined who I was.

Leaving behind everyone I didnt know how my freedom also got left behind somewhere ~ freedom of expression, freedom of discretion, freedom of movement, freedom of thinking, freedom to be as I am, to be as I was... "The best thing in the world is freedom ~ freedom to say 'no' " I had read somewhere. I couldnt have agreed on this more. But in those days I discovered a couple of other best things of the world too. Things ~ which none can do without....things ~ which if gone from the life, would make life lifeless. Through self experience I discovered the best things in the world are freedom, love and hope. The freedom to be as you are, the freedom to become what you want to be. Love to give selflessly and receive unconditionally. And hope to keep you dreaming and moving on, and working for a better tomorrow. Without freedom, love and hope you cant go too far...

My loss in those days was complete and had covered all of these three things. Its been a couple of years since then, and going through the peaks and valleys of life I have lived many moments and died many too...But none of the lowest moments of these years have pulled me down to the pits of hoplessness and the feeling of 'having lost all' which I had reached in those days.

I'm thankful to the almighty who took care of me then, to the large oak tree in the garden who listened to my woes then, to the stars of that who gave me company and solace to my forlorn soul then. And to this life who gave me a chance to spring back again. Wherever I am feeling low and lonely and dejected, I remind myself of those days, and the state I was in then, the things and the people I had lost, which by a benevolant twist of destiny I have regained today. And no matter how much low I am feeling, my spirits are lifted. Its like, I had died and was then reborn, and nothing else that happens to me now can be as bad as that death.

Looking at the beauty of the September sky today ~ the coloured clouds and the mellowing foliage, I deeply inhale the light cool breeze, and say to myself ~ "Nothing is lost, I am free, to love, to hope, to dream and to be..."